Trader Joe’s Brownie Crisps

Trader Joe's Brownie Crisps

At the intersection of “brownie” “cookie” and “not good”

Quick question, what’s the best part about brownies? The warm, chewy, goo-aliciousness, right? The chocolate is good, but if I was just interested in chocolate I’d be eating a chocolate bar or having a piece of fudge.

Ranking: 1 star 1 star rating

What it is: Over-baked brownie-like cookies
Price: $2.99 for a small 5 oz. bag
Worth it: No. Not at all.

No sir, when I go after a brownie, it’s for the distinct, almost startling clear, sensory image of biting into a warm, chewy and, yes, goo-alicious square of melted bliss. And also sometimes to get high – but that’s a different issue entirely and completely legal in many states.

Trader Joe’s Brownie Crisps, then, are not just a disappointment but a failure of brownie-kind. Although brownies are promised what you actually receive are thin, hard, dry, brittle squares of brown cookie. These are like brownies in so far as a pop-tart is like a fresh raspberry torte. All of that ooey-gooey goodness is no where to be found, and in its place is nothing worthwhile or redeeming. Even if taken just as a cookie, these Brownie Crisps notably hard and dry. I’ve had chocolate chip cookies from a vending machine with more life than these.

These brownie “cookies” are, essentially, very badly over baked brownies. If I forgot I had some brownies in the oven and came back to find them absolutely parched and glued to the bottom of the pan, I’d throw them out. I most definitely wouldn’t chisel them out, package them and try and sell them to people.

Frankly, I over-cook brownies enough on my own time. If I wanted that experience, I’m free to pick up some of Trader Joe’s brownie mixes (such as their quick-bake or reduced guilt mixes) and go to town. For a pre-made brownie/cookie product I expect something a little better. They look especially lackluster coming, as they do, right on the heels of the actually delicious tea cookies I reviewed previously.

I’m kind of at a loss for what to do about these. Wasting food is something I almost never do – but I couldn’t interest anyone in taking a second bite, and I certainly am not going to be eating them myself.

The Breakdown

Would I Recommend Them: Only if I wanted to disappoint someone.

Would I Buy Them Again: Definitely not.

Final Synopsis: Failure as a cookie. Failure as a brownie.

Trader Joe's Brownie Crisps - Nutrition Facts

Trader Joe’s Brownie Crisps – Nutrition Facts


9 Comments on “Trader Joe’s Brownie Crisps”

  1. Bob says:

    In case you have never done so before, it sounds like it’s time to give Trader Joe’s vaunted no-questions-asked refund policy a try.

  2. Kristen says:

    Whaaaat! I’m so surprised. I LOVED these. So much so, I grabbed a second bag in the span of a week. It may be because in the first bag, I recieved an entire brownie and I was testing my luck. That’s besides the point. Anywaaays, that’s so dissapointing that you didn’t enjoy them.

    • Anonymous says:

      I’m with Kristen, I loved these too! When I read crisp I was expecting the crunch (instead of the chew) and it was the perfect balance of bitter and sweet! I’ll definitely be buying more! (They crumble great on ice cream too!)

  3. Bewbsiebee says:

    They’re not supposed to resemble the ooo-ey gooey brownie feel. .its for the people that like the crunchy corners 🙂

    Have you tried Shelia G’s Brownie Brittle?– its the same premise 🙂

  4. Lauren says:

    I have returned numerous things that were not living up to expectations…they are seriously great and no questions asked!

  5. Alek says:

    TJ’s has really good return policy. No questions asked. It is a great way to try new products risk-free. Even opened! My mother didn’t like the fish so I went back to TJ’s with 1/2 bag of the fish and they were great with the policy. Didn’t ask me why just refunded me.

  6. Tara says:

    Highly disappointed in this product? More disappointed that these guys are in the product knock-off business.

  7. Dave says:

    I live these they are delicious and they are much healthier (nutritional wise) than other brownies. And for this summer they are great they go well with yogurts, smoothies, you name it! As customers of this product we don’t expect gooey brownies, we expect a crunch out of them. Seriously ***** stars!!!

  8. Renee says:

    I personally don’t care for them, but it’s great that they’re available for those who do like them, and especially for people who must only eat gluten free foods.

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