Trader Joe’s Product Ranking and Table of Contents

Below you’ll find my entirely subjective rankings of every product I’ve tried at Trader Joe’s.

You’ll see that I’m making use of that old workhorse, the Five Star ranking system. 2 star, 3 star and 4 star rankings are based entirely on my own personal taste and are open to lively debate. 1 star and 5 star items, on the other hand, are simply the cold hard facts of life.

Each product name links to its review for easy browsing and/or criticizing.


Legend:

This product should be publicly shamed. Only buy it if under incredible duress.

** Not my cup of tea, but some dudes might like it.

**A fine product without notable defect.

**** Really good! I buy this and so should you.

***** Never leave Trader Joe’s without this. Consider violence as a means to obtain it.


Product Name Rank
Trader Joe’s Saturn Peaches **
Trader Joe’s Chili Spiced Pineapple ****
Trader Joe’s Green Protein ***
Trader Joe’s Kumato Brown Tomatoes ***
Villa Italia Italian Blood Orange Soda ***
Trader Joe’s Potato Trio ***
Trader Joe’s Vacuum Fried Banana Chips ****
Trader Joe’s Apple & Carrot Fruit Crushers ***
Trader Joe’s Ready to Bake Brownies ***
Trader Joe’s Flower Pepper ****
Trader Joe’s Roasted Seaweed Snack ***
Trader Joe’s Dried Fruit – Green Mango ****
Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate covered Peanut Butter Wafer Cookies **
Trader Joe’s Mango! Mango! Fruit and Yogurt Gummy ***
Trader Joe’s Mango and Papaya Salsa ***
Trader Joe’s Dried Fruit – Just Mango Slices ****
Trader Joe’s Mango Green Tea ***
Trader Joe’s Super Seeded Tortilla Chips ***
Trader Joe’s South African Smoke Seasoning Blend *****
Trader Joe’s Edamame Hummus ***
Trader Joe’s Organic Tomatillo & Roasted Yellow Chili Salsa ***
Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Roasted Pistachio Toffee **
OKF Organic Aloe Vera Drink ****
Trader Joe’s Marinated Beet Salad **
Trader Joe’s Chili Lime Chicken Burger ****
Trader Joe’s Beet and Purple Carrot Juice *
Trader Joe’s Milk Chocolate Covered Potato Chips ****
Trader Joe’s Pear Cinnamon Cider ***
Arabian Joe’s Spicy Spinach Pizzas ****
Trader Joe’s Unflavored Organic Coconut Milk Beverage **
Trader Joe’s Ridge Cut Sweet Potato Chips ***
Trader Joe’s Blueberry and Pomegranate Green Tea ***
Trader Joe’s Speculoos Cookie Butter *****
Trader Joe’s Prune Walnut Log **
Trader Joe’s Organic Carrot Juice ****
Trader Joe’s Tangerine Juice ***
Trader Joe’s Kale Chips *
Trader Joe’s Wild Salmon Jerky **
Wonder Natural Foods – Better’n Peanut Butter, Low Sodium ****
Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Covered Coconut Mango Bites **
Trader Joe’s Speculoos Crunchy Cookie Butter *****
Trader Joe’s Organic Stone Ground Salt and Pepper Dark Chocolate ****
Trader Joe’s Minestrone Soup ****
Trader Joe’s Freeze Dried Red Seedless Grapes ***
Trader Joe’s Lightly Sweetened Coconut Strips ***
Trader Joe’s Field Fresh Chopped Salad with Grilled Chicken ***
Trader Joe’s PB&J Milk Chocolate Bar ***
Trader Joe’s Spicy Seaweed Ramen ***
Trader Joe’s Dried Kimchi *
Trader Joe’s Hake en Papillote ****
Trader Joe’s Quince Paste **
Trader Joe’s Roasted Butternut Squash Red Quinoa and Wheat Berry Salad ****
Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Nibs **
Trader Joe’s Dukkah ****
Trader Joe’s Authentically Korean Seaweed Salad with Spicy Dressing ***
Trader Jose’s (Joe’s) Pizza Al Pollo Asado ****
Trader Joe’s Sunflower Seed Butter ***
Trader Joe’s Stuffed Peppers with Seasoned Turkey and Rice ****
Trader Joe’s Thai Lime Shrimp Skewers **
Trader Joe’s Cioppino Seafood Stew ****
Trader Joe’s Raspberry and Vanilla Cream Bars **
Trader Joe’s Chile Rellano **
Trader Joe’s Vegetable and Grain Country Salad ****
Trader Jose’s Vegetable Stuffed Poblano Peppers ***
Trader Joe’s Cultured Coconut Milk – (Blueberry & Vanilla Flavors) ***
Trader Joe’s Dried California Persimmons ***
Trader Joe’s Boysenberry Fruit Bar and Trader Joe’s Apple & Raspberry Fruit Wrap ***
Trader Joe’s Chicken Cilantro Mini Wontons ***
Trader Joe’s Grilled Chicken Cacciatore **
Trader Joe’s Grilled Balsamic Vinegar and Rosemary Chicken ****
Trader Giotto’s (Joe’s) Balsamic Glaze ***
Trader Joe’s Cauliflower Romanesco Basilic ****
Trader Joe’s Uncured Turkey Bacon and Trader Joe’s Uncured Peppered Turkey Bacon ***
Trader Joe’s Truffle Mousse Pate ***
Trader Joe’s Grilled Eggplant and Zucchini Melange ***
Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Honey Mints ***
Trader Joe’s Super Spinach Salad ***
Trader Jacque’s (Trader Joe’s) Beurre Meuniere Popcorn **
Trader Joe’s Crunchy Black and White Rice Rolls ***
Trader Joe’s Cowboy Caviar Salsa ****
Trader Joe’s Cheddar and Horseradish Chips ***
Trader Joe’s 4 Dried Whole Persimmons ****
Trader Joe’s Broccoli Slaw and Kale Salad with White Chicken Meat ****
Trader Joe’s Red Pepper Spread with Eggplant and Garlic **
Trader Joe’s Indian Fare – Punjab Eggplant ***
Trader Joe’s Artichoke and Hearts of Palm Salad ***
Trader Joe’s Eggplant Garlic Spread ***
Family Tree Farms Plumogranate Plumcot (Pluot) ***
Trader Joe’s Bacon and Spinach Salad ***
Trader Joe’s Tropical Sweetened Matcha Green Tea Mix *
Trader Joe’s Cold Brew Coffee Concentrate *****
Trader Joe’s Black Figs ***
Trader Joe’s Crunchy Curls – Lentil & Potato Snack **
Trader Joe’s Carolina Gold Barbeque Sauce ****
Trader Joe’s Creamy Almond Butter & Trader Joe’s Crunchy Almond Butter **
Trader Joe’s Honey Roasted Macadamia Nuts ***
Trader Joe’s Chile Spiced Mango **
Trader Joe’s Many Clove Garlic Cooking and Simmer Sauce ***
Trader Ming’s (Trader Joe’s) Kung Pao Chicken ****
Trader Jose’s (Trader Joe’s) MexiCali Salad ***
Trader Joe’s Sriracha Sauce ***
Trader Joe’s Quinoa Teriyaki Mushroom Rolls *
Trader Joe’s Pizza Veggie Burgers ****
Trader Joe’s Onion Dip Mix ***
ACE Hard Pumpkin Cider ***
Trader Joe’s Pure Coconut Water ****
Trader Joe’s Salad with BBQ Flavored Chicken **
Trader Joe’s Harvest Blend Herbal Tea ****
Trader Joe’s Gorgonzola & Walnut Salad **
Trader Joe’s Petite Seafood Croquettes ***
Trader Joe’s Balela ****
Trader Joe’s Greens and Seeds Salad ***
Trader Joe’s Pita Crisps with Cranberries and Pumpkin Seeds ***
Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Butter ***
Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Waffles **
Trader Joe’s Mini Pumpkin Pies ****
Trader Joe’s Speculoos Cookie and Cocoa Swirl Spread ****
Trader Joe’s Non-fat Pumpkin Greek Yogurt ***
Trader Joe’s Corn and Chile Tomato-Less Salsa **
Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Soup **
Trader Joe’s Turkey Gobbler Wrap ***
Trader Joe’s Tempura Shrimp Crunch Rolls ****
Trader Joe’s Dolmas **
Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Triple Ginger Cookie **
Trader Joe’s Himalayan Salt with Truffles ***
Trader Joe’s Meatless Breakfast Patties ***
Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Croissants ****
Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Covered Marshmallows & Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Minty Mallows **
Trader Joe’s Sipping Chocolate Inspired by European Tradition ***
Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Caramallows ****
Trader Joe’s Triple Ginger Brew ****
Europa ChocoVine – Original **
Trader Joe’s Ruggedly Adventuresome Cowboy Bark **
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8 Comments on “Trader Joe’s Product Ranking and Table of Contents”

  1. Leila says:

    Just discovered your blog today while I was looking for reviews of TJ’s dolmas. What a great resource. Is there a way to sort the chart by number of stars? Do you take special requests of things to comment on?

    • Glad you like it! Can’t sort the chart at the moment, but maybe someday.

      Feel free to send a special request, particularly if its something strange!

      • Melissa says:

        I absolutely love the Nutty Grain salad that you gave a horrible review. I don’t know why you did. I ate it with their white meat chicken salad & had an awesome lunch! I guess that’s why I take all Food Bloggers reviews with a grain of salt. 😊

  2. Alana Leger says:

    If you search the page for ” ***** ” and then ” **** ” and so forth, you can see which items she ranks as five stars, four stars, etc.

  3. Anonymous says:

    You are hilarious! Thank you for the reviews!

  4. david says:

    glad that i found this blog!

  5. David Mccoy says:

    Glad to have found this valuable resource!


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