Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Rolls with Pumpkin Spiced Icing
Posted: October 21, 2014 Filed under: Bread, Pumpkin, Trader Joe's Brand | Tags: 4 stars, cinnamon rolls, pumpkin, pumpkin rolls, Trader Joe's 5 Comments
Ooey, gooey, and pumpkin-based
Trader Joe’s will put pumpkin in anything. Some of these things are expected – such as their pumpkin soup, some of these things are unexpected such as their pumpkin croissants. Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Rolls with Pumpkin Spiced Icing are definitely an example of the later. Has anyone ever looked at a cinnamon bun and thought “Somebody should really take the cinnamon out of this and replace it with pumpkin. And pumpkin flavored icing.” No, of course not, but Trader Joe’s did it. They did it, and it’s actually pretty good.
Trader Joe’s took the same dough they already use in their cinnamon rolls, but have had the cinnamon goo that fills the roll’s folds replaced by a puree of pumpkin and pumpkin pie spices (e.g. nutmeg, cinnamon and clove). Trader Joe’s Cinnamon Roll dough is some of the best you can find on a grocery store shelf, so the result is a delicious pastry roll that cooks up beautifully golden brown, with a soft, warm and chewy center. The pumpkin puree that replaces the cinnamon mash is of the same consistency, giving the dough that ooey-gooey stickiness that is essential for a truly satisfying sticky bun.
While the buns feel every bit as good as a cinnamon roll, they don’t quite taste as good. Don’t get me wrong – the pumpkin bun is delectable and every bit as soft and sweet as a cinnamon bun, but cinnamon buns are damn near perfect. As good as the pumpkin rolls were, the sticky, bubbling hot spiciness of true cinnamon buns are better, just by dint of being a cinnamon bun. That’s not to say the pumpkin rolls don’t taste good in their own right – they certainly do. The pumpkin rolls are sugary sweet and delicious, and bring in the taste of pumpkin and spice without being too overwhelming. It’s a little like the rolls are glazed with pumpkin pie filling instead of cinnamon and sugar – and while that’s good, it’s not better than the cinnamon and sugar.
The exact same can be said of the pumpkin spice infused frosting. It’s delicious, sugary, thick and sticky – just like good frosting should be. There’s more than enough to ice each bun, and matches just right with the pipping hot rolls – but it would have been even better if it had been a classic cream-cheese frosting.
Once again, we’re faced with the notion of why to buy this at all. Simply because it’s novel is the only compelling argument I have. Pumpkin season comes but once a year, and it’s fun to pick up a few pumpkin rolls to ring in the autumn. If you feel that little nagging call to celebrate the Harvest through moderately varied food stuffs, then by all means pick up Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Rolls with Pumpkin Spiced Icing – they’re delicious and you’ll enjoy every bite. If, however, the idea of pumpkin rolls for pumpkin roll’s sake doesn’t do it for you, rest easy knowing that you’re not really missing out. Their difference is valuable, but it’s unlikely you’ll ever prefer them to the real deal.
The only thing to be aware of is that, as in Trader Joe’s Cinnamon Rolls, the Pumpkin Rolls only come five to a pack. Odd numbers are terribly inconvenient when it comes to cooking for any size table, and prime numbers are all the more so. Unless you’re making breakfast for exactly 5 diners, or cooking for very lopsided appetites, you’ll want to pick up 2 cans to make sure things divide evenly. If I thought highly enough of Trader Joe’s marketing department, I’d almost accuse them of doing that on purpose – the crafty bastards.
The Breakdown
Would I Recommend Them: Sure – they’re quite tasty, in their own way.
Would I Buy Them Again: Nope, I’ll go back to cinnamon rolls.
Final Synopsis: Almost as delicious as cinnamon rolls.
Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Rolls – Nutrition Facts
Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Panettone
Posted: September 29, 2015 Filed under: Trader Joe's Brand | Tags: 3 stars, bread, cake, Deserts, italian food, panettone, pumpkin, Trader Joe's 1 Comment
The kind of panettone Jack Skellington would have been made.
As you may have noticed from my unofficial first post last week – Pumpkin Season has returned again to Trader Joe’s! Today, we really get right into the swing of things with Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Panettone – a pumpkin-spiced, pumpkin-cream filled, Italian desert bread stuffed with candied pumpkin.
| What it is: | A bready cake made with candied pumpkin. |
| Price: | $5.99 for a 26.5 oz cake. |
| Worth it: | No – not as good as regular panettone. |
Yes, as you can tell from the last sentence the annual pumpkin madness has fallen upon us again – the most exciting and, occasionally, harrowing time of the year. There’s no telling what fresh chimeras or monstrous hybrids the Trader Joe’s food scientists have cooked up in their labs, secreted far from judging eyes in the protective, pumpkin-scented bedrock of TJ’s Monrovia headquarters.
The season of Pumpkin Madness at Trader Joe’s is a time to mentally prepare yourself before you go shopping – there’s no knowing what what miracle or nightmare may be lurking around every corner – from the heavenly delights of Trader Joe’s pumpkin-glazed, pumpkin cinnamon rolls, to the terrors of Trader Joe’s Non-Fat Pumpkin Greek Yogurt, to the mind-wrenching bafflement of Trader Joe’s pumpkin spiced pumpkin seeds and Pumpkin Joe-Joe’s.
Where does Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Panettone fall in this pumpkin spectrum? That depends in large part how you feel about panettone in general.
As you may or may not know, panettone (pronounced, approximately: “pa-nuh-toe-ni”) is a traditional Italian Christmas “cake”. I put cake in quotes here, because even though it’s generally referred to as such, panettone is much airier and “bread-ier” than the more common sort of American cakes. Like fruitcake, panettone is more of a concept than a set recipe, and is made as many different ways as there are people who make it. Nevertheless, all panettone are linked by a couple universal factors – they’re laced with dried or candied fruit, dabs of marscapone cream, and are always airy and bready.
Trader Joe’s does carry regular panettone around the holidays, so they know how they’re made. This year it seems they couldn’t contain their excitement for the sweet bread any longer, and decided to bring us a unique, pumpkin-based version. Instead of candied citrus and raisins, there’s candied pumpkin. Instead of marscapone cream there’s pumpkin-flavored cream. There’s even dried pumpkin powder worked into the dough. With that much pumpkin, you might expect the cake to be a double-fisted pumpkin punch to the jaw. Instead, it hardly tastes like pumpkin at all. All you’ll really taste is the traditional, bready panettone cake, and the sugary sweetness of the cream and sugar. The actual pumpkin bits – as numerous as they are, have been denatured of their natural pumpkin flavor. At best, if you’re paying attention, you’ll notice a very, very subtle pumpkin aftertaste and that’s it.
Pannettone – featuring candied pumpkin and pumpkin creme.
The overall effect is somewhat bizarre. It’s like having a glimpse into some alternate universe where the twisted occupants make panettone for Halloween instead of Christmas. In fact, this is probably what Trader Joe’s has in mind for this product. Each Pumpkin Panettone comes packaged in a very nice looking gift box, including a pretty little ribbon handle – perfect for a little host/hostess gift.
In terms of a nice looking gift, you could do worse. Show up with a Pumpkin Panettone and a bottle of wine to the seasonal autumn party of your choice and you’ll look quite dashing. Just don’t wait around the buffet table fishing for compliments – this panettone is likely to impress visually, but the taste is more likely to leave people scratching their heads than going back for seconds.
If you like Christmas panettone you are likely to enjoy this – the pumpkin hardly makes an appearance, and the sweet bread aspect is dominant. If you’ve never much enjoyed panettone, or if you’re looking for something heavy on the pumpkin, you should pass this up.
Alternatively, I would highly recommend punching it. The high, domed form of the panettone, combined with the soft and airy interior, make it an absolute delight to deliver a devastating front punch to. If you buy a Pumpkin Panettone, and you don’t like it, I’d definitely suggest winding up and letting one fly directly at the top of the dome before taking it back to TJ’s for a refund.
The Breakdown
Would I Recommend It: Not really – unless you like panettone that doesn’t taste like pumpkin.
Would I Buy It Again: No thanks.
Final Synopsis: Very satisfying to punch.
Trader Joe’s (Trader Giotto’s) Panettone French Toast
Posted: January 21, 2016 Filed under: Trader Joe's Brand 3 Comments
French bread, as we all know, is one of the most delicious breakfast options known to man – a top tier breakfast, right up there with oven-fresh cinnamon buns or heart-clogging monte cristos. It’s so good no one has really been bothered about innovating it much over the last few hundred years. No one, that is, until Trader Joe’s showed up on the scene. I should have seen it coming, given that we just saw them introduce such radical breakfast foods as candied-ginger pancakes, and pumpkin glazed cinnamon rolls, but Trader Joe’s has blown my mind again with their candied citrus and vanilla custard infused Panettone French Toast.
| What it is: | French toast with candied fruit in it. |
| Price: | $3.49 for 4 slices. |
| Worth it: | Not really. A little expensive for what you’re getting. |
If you aren’t already familiar with the festive, bread-like cake known as panettone, you can read about some of Trader Joe’s previous takes on it here, for their classic panettone, or here, for their strange new pumpkin-infused panettone. Long story short, Italians like to fill sweet, airy breads with bits of candied fruit peel and globs of mascarpone and cream. Think of it as occupying the opposite end of the Festive Holiday Cake Spectrum from traditional English fruit cake – airy and buoyant instead of damp and dense.
If you, like myself, are not a big panettone fan, it’s likely you’ve got an issue with how dang bready the loaf is. I go to cake for cake and bread for bread – there’s not a lot of satisfaction from settling in at the half-way point. However, in a real stroke of genius, Trader Joe’s has taken this perceived flaw and turned it into a strength. Too bready? Not if you’re making toast out of it. And that’s exactly what Trader Joe’s has done – they’ve reached into their stockpile of panettone, sliced them up, dipped them in some eggy custard and dropped them on the griddle. The fully cooked french toast is then frozen and boxed up for easy pre-heating.
All four slices of toast – BEFORE going into the oven.
The result are thick slabs of french toast that happen to be studded with raisins and bits of candied fruit peel, here and there. I expected the french-toastification process to change the basic flavor of the panettone, but it hasn’t. These big slices of toast taste exactly as if you sawed a few slices off your Christmas panettone loaf and toasted them. Each bite is a bit stiff, a bit dry and, while denser than traditional panettone, still a bit airy. The candied citrus peel and raisins still taste just as they did before – sweet and sugary.
I didn’t find Trader Joe’s Panettone French Toast to be any better or worse than ordinary french toast, just different. The sweet fruits are an interesting touch, but unless you’re a huge fan of bits of candied fruit, they don’t really do much to elevate the french toast. That’s too bad, as I was ready for this french bread to blow my mind. It’s a perfectly find french toast, and if you don’t mind paying $3.49 for 4 slices of it, it makes for a sweet breakfast treat, but isn’t a game changer.
The Breakdown
Would I Recommend It: Not especially strongly.
Would I Buy It Again: I don’t think so.
Final Synopsis: Not bad, but not amazing.
Trader Joe’s Panettone French Toast – Nutrition Facts
Eating at Joe’s – Best of Trader Joe’s 2015 Round Up
Posted: December 30, 2014 Filed under: Trader Joe's Brand | Tags: best of 2014 3 CommentsAnother calendar year has fleeted its way by, and are we any richer for it? Why yes, indeed we are – for Trader Joe’s has brought forth another cornucopia of culinary delights and downright crazy concoctions. It was a year of many new foods to review – from Cruciferous Crunch to Uttapam. Here were my top ten favorite, presented in no particular order.
I never thought that I’d be putting Brussels sprouts on a list like this, let alone Brussels sprouts that have been crossbred with kale, but I suppose that’s just another example of the mystery of life’s many ways.
Trader Joe’s Kale Sprouts are a relatively brand new type of produce that combines the blends the best parts of kale and Brussels sprouts together, while downplaying their flaws. I took a liking to these little heads of “lollipop kale” – so much so that when it comes to cooking, I doubt I’d ever choose a bag of ordinary kale or Brussels sprouts over these ever again.
Trader Joe’s Harvest Blend Complete Salad
Trader Joe’s has long trafficked in the many and wonderful varieties of pre-made, single serving salads in a tub, but Trader Joe’s Harvest Blend Complete Salad was their first foray into pre-made, multi-serving bag salads. Even though it was hung upon the gimmick of “pumpkin in everything”, I found this salad’s flavors so well paired, and the salad itself so robust and filling, that I wouldn’t hesitate to put it toe-to-toe with any Trader Joe’s salad – period.
Here’s hoping TJ’s continues with this trend of bagged salads in 2015.
Trader Joe’s Cookies and Creme Cookie Butter
Trader Joe’s finally cracked the Cookie Butter conundrum this year with their startlingly new Cookies and Creme Cookie Butter. After putting out every variation on the original Speculoos Cookie Butter formula they could thing of, TJ’s finally branched out into whole new varieties of cookies to make the condiment out of.
Cookies and Creme cookie butter owes it’s inspiration to the Oreo cookie, combining thick veins of rich chocolate cream with rich vanilla crème. The result was almost overwhelmingly sweet – a short step down from eating frosting directly. For me it fell short of the glory of the original speculoos variety, but it also suggests a whole new galaxy of potential cookie butters to come. I’ll be keeping an eager eye on the cookie butter shelves this coming year.
Trader Joe’s Scallion Pancakes (Pa Jeon)
One of two, savory Asian pancakes I tried this year, Trader Joe’s Scallion Pancakes are an import of a Korean classic. TJ’s does justice to it’s origins with the dish, with this addictive dish. Whether eaten on their own, topped with chopped seafood, or doused with dipping sauces, these crunchy-on-the-outside, moist-on-the-inside onion-based flapjacks were an instant favorite of mine for any time of day. Possibly my favorite use of scallions ever.
Trader Joe’s Coffeehaus European Style Low Fat Yogurt – Mocha and Chocolate flavors
This was a strongly divisive product this year. My review may sound less than glowing – referring the the taste of this distinctly European yogurt as “sour chocolate” – but not unlike “sour onion” or “salt and vinegar” this was a combination of tastes that was novel, intriguing and surprisingly tasty. Certainly worth trying at least once, if only to experience such a uniquely European taste.
Trader Joe’s Aloo Chaat Kati Pouch
I would probably have added Trader Joe’s Aloo Chaat Kati Pouches to this list for the sheer lyricality of the name alone. Inspired by Indian street food, these on-the-go potato pouches are like the grown-up version of Hot Pockets. Healthier and tastier than those pizza wads, the aloo chaat kati pouch is a great way to eat a microwaved meal while feeling multi-cultural instead of like a sad loner. The only questions now is if Trader Joe’s will come out with more flavors of kati pouch.
I’m a sucker for any food product that I can’t pronounce the name of, and will purchase anything that fits that criteria on sight. In the case of Trader Joe’s 4 Kouigns Amann this worked out in my favor. Flaky Breton pastries with sweet caramelized bottoms, kougins amman have been making their appearance in trendy bakeries across the country. That Trader Joe’s lets you cook up these sweet rolls at home makes the experience all the better.
Trader Joe’s 4 Uttapam with Coconut Chutney
The other savory Asian pancake I tried this year also made it on to my best of 2014 list. A traditional Indian repast, Uttapam are thick, doughy pancakes made with a sort of sour dough bread and topped with diced onion and herbs. Totally different from the Scallion Pancakes, they nonetheless were a tasty and delightful new flat bread I was happy to stumble across. Topped with the included coconut chutney, or eaten as part of a larger meal, these Tamil treats are something everyone should give a try.
Trader Joe’s Cruciferous Crunch Collection
My personal darling this year. Now that I stock up on this stuff weekly, it’s hard to imagine a time before Trader Joe’s carried this astoundingly simple mix of shredded red and green cabbage, kale, and Brussels sprouts. Not only is it a wonderful addition to any salad, and a snap to cook, but the name is a masterpiece. I’ll be eating Trader Joe’s Cruciferous Crunch Collection for the rest of 2015, 2016, and so on until California finally snaps off and sinks into the sea.
Trader Joe’s Uncured Apple Smoked Bacon
You guys know I’m no fan of the Cult of Bacon and it’s knee-jerk worship of any food product that even has the word “bacon” in its name. Sure guys, it’s good stuff – fat and salt are a wondrous combination – but it’s not like we’re talking manna from heaven or anything.
That said, my knees literally went weak when I put a fried slice of Trader Joe’s Uncured Apple Smoked Bacon on my tongue. This is bacon worth singing the praises of. The smell alone as it crackles on the stove is enough to get every mouth in the house drooling. It’s more expensive than your ordinary side of bacon, but it’d still be a deal at twice the price.
Editor’s Choice: Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Joe-Joe’s
These are on the list only because I’m crazy. Their inclusion here has nothing to do with their taste, which was sort of average, but with the box design. Trader Joe’s commits to Pumpkin Season like moray eels commit to a bite. They are not screwing around, to put it mildly. Trader Joe’s box art on this box more elegantly sums up the peculiar pumpkin pyscosis that Trader Joe’s undergoes every October than my deluge of words – although I certainly tried – and for that it deserves special praise.
Obligatory Cookie Butter Entry: Trader Joe’s Cookie Butter Ice Cream
Ice cream with Speculoos Cookie Butter in it. ’nuff said.
Trader Joe’s Product Ranking and Table of Contents
Posted: January 23, 2014 Filed under: 8 CommentsBelow you’ll find my entirely subjective rankings of every product I’ve tried at Trader Joe’s.
You’ll see that I’m making use of that old workhorse, the Five Star ranking system. 2 star, 3 star and 4 star rankings are based entirely on my own personal taste and are open to lively debate. 1 star and 5 star items, on the other hand, are simply the cold hard facts of life.
Each product name links to its review for easy browsing and/or criticizing.
Legend:
* This product should be publicly shamed. Only buy it if under incredible duress.
** Not my cup of tea, but some dudes might like it.
*** A fine product without notable defect.
**** Really good! I buy this and so should you.
***** Never leave Trader Joe’s without this. Consider violence as a means to obtain it.
Trader Joe’s Greens and Seeds Salad
Posted: October 15, 2013 Filed under: Feta, Pomegranate, Salad, squash, Trader Joe's Brand, Vegetarian | Tags: feta, pumpkin, pumpkin seeds Leave a comment
Greens and seeds *and* squash, is more like it.
I picked up Trader Joe’s Greens and Seeds Salad the other day after a moment’s hesitation. Greens and seeds? Seeds are not normally my go to salad toppings. I was even more surprised by the ingredients: butternut squash, feta cheese, pomegranate and pumpkin seeds. First off, I’m not sure butternut squash counts as anyone’s idea of “greens”, but more than that, who’s ever heard of mixing pumpkin and pomegranate seeds together. Nevertheless, remembering the rather delicious lessons Trader Joe’s couscous and cabbage and quinoa and wheat berry salads taught me, I decided that I’d better just suck it up and give it a try.
Folks, I’m glad I did. The salad mix might be unconventional, but the taste is right on. This is exactly the kind of salad I go for – a hearty, robust mouthful that hits every taste bud on the way down. Where salads like Trader Joe’s Walnut & Gorgonzola focus on a narrow, rather bland taste profile, the greens and seeds in this mix cover the whole pallet. The butternut squash is savory with mellow, earthy tones, the feta is as intensely flavorful as a nice fragrant fetid should be, the pomegranate packs that astringent, high-toned zing, and the pepitas are salty and nutty. It could, and maybe should, be the taste equivalent of dressing in a tux, sandals, and a clown wig, but somehow it manages to all hang together. The eclectic assortment of tastes are helped in no small part by the excellent salad dressing pairing – a zingy and creamy honey dijon balsamic. The dressing is strong, quite mustardy and vinegary, so you might only want to put about a third of it on at first, but it’s this strength that unites and accentuate the tastes of the other ingredients.
Two potential marks against the salad. First, it’s meat free. I’m perfectly happy to make a meal of salad alone, which generally means I’m looking for something with at least a little meat in it. That said, all the cheese and seeds in this salad means that you’re getting 11 grams of protein per serving. That’s not bad. The other caveat is that the squash is, as you might expect, a bit squishy. That doesn’t bother me, but if you get hung up on texture this may not be the salad for you.
Trader Joe’s rolls out new salads all the time, but this rather wild salad combination has come out this fall for more reason than mere happenstance. Spring mix and summer salads abound, but this is one of the few truly autumnal salads I’ve ever had – a pointed and purposeful concoction made with only those ingredients that are in season during the harvest – or so they say on the company website, at least. I’m a food fan, sure, but I’m an even bigger fan of food born out of high concept musings. Kudos on this happening salad, TJ!
The Breakdown
Would I Recommend It: Yes, if you don’t mind squishy squash in your salad, you’ll love this one.
Would I Buy It Again: Absolutely, I’m adding it to the shopping list now.
Final Synopsis: A hearty salad with a tasty autumnal bent.
Eating At Joes 
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